Thoughts
I don't feel guilty for being away because a small break is was what I needed. To make space for other creative things in my life. To let new ideas come to me. To figure out what my next steps with this blog would be. That is the beauty of taking a break, they are a pause to think and be creative.
Read MoreOne month ago I challenged myself to meditating every single day. These are my honest impression of having a meditation practice amd what I have learned over the course of this first month!
Read MoreI currently have a pretty severe strain in my right forearm. I've had it for nearly a week and it will still be there for at least a few more days. I swear I have a reason for telling you this...
The thing is that I know exactly what it is from because I have had this pain before. It's a result of my appalling desk posture. I often will work in an uncomfortable position, mindlessly, for hours only to realize it the next day when I go to grab something and I feel a sharp pain. I, like most people, have a lot of these mindless habits. I bite my nails, I forget to eat lunch, I leave the house to work and arrive at my desk not noticing the 15 minutes that had passed. I just get lost in my thoughts. Often.
Getting lost in your thoughts aren't a big deal but, as I have discussed in the past, I feel like these little mindless moments add up to a lot of life lost, or enable habits I'd prefer not to have; flashback to all those times I have eaten a whole box of cookies in one sitting and not notice until my knuckles hit the cardboard. Oops.
This is why I challenged myself to the 100 Day Project, but my version of it. This project was initially created for makers to make for 100 days in a row. It is an exercise in appreciating the process and understanding one's creativity. I want to use it to build my mindfulness muscle. I plan to do this through meditating, developing mindfulness "triggers," and studying up on mindful philosophy. I have begin documenting my first days on Instagram (if you aren't following me there please do, that's where all the magic has been happening lately!) and am about to say buh-bye to week 1!
I am very excited to see how this goes, I have no hypotheses at this point. I am just taking a shot in the dark and feeling my way through hoping to be a more present and appreciative version of myself by the end of it all.
A little over a year ago it was early morning and I was walking the damp, dark streets of lower Manhattan to my office. Imagine cold winter winds, and the noise of construction added to the rushed feeling of every workday. It isn't surprising that I came to dread that walk each day. I would turn on autopilot for each of the 15 minutes each way and managed to just barely tolerate it. Given that I have a limited number of these half hour periods each day (about 32 intact, I did the math), I began to realize spending even one of them feeling miserable or checked out is a waste of my life. 130 hours a year of just "getting by," NOPE. I decided I didn't want to just give away that time anymore so I started what I though would be a simple challenge.
My challenge: to be present (or "mindful") during that walk. Despite the fact that I couldn't control the weather or the noise or the all of the city grime, I wanted to pay attention and find at least one thing amongst the chaos I could witness and appreciate. Some of these things I began to document on Instagram, or I would share with friends directly. Some of them I would keep for myself. Sometimes it would be an object, other times an interaction between people. At times I would just savor a feeling I had. This little practice on my walk evolved to observing myself, how I felt, how I walk, how I breathe and very quickly my walk became something enjoyable (even in the cold weather!).
The reason this was difficult is because it required me to quiet my thoughts and acknowledge my environment. I was so used to letting my mind run, usually trying to anticipate what the day would hold, that I didn't notice my surroudings or even myself. This was my perfect intro to mindfulness and meditation. It was a short, consistent activity to get my feet wet in this world.
At the time I had no idea of how vast these practices were. My only goal was to stop taking these 30 minutes a day for granted and try to experience something new before I reached the office and spent 8 hours working away. Now, a year later, I have been done more research and expanded my practice I am experiencing new benefits benefits.
So far I have noticed that mindfulness has helped me limit the anxious rumination and overthinking in my head. It is also improving how I interact with other people, allowing me to be more engaged and a much more compassionate listener. Along those same lines my memory is improving (because I am actually making memories and not getting lost in my head!). And I also feel more appreciation. This one is hard to explain, but I think that when your are present and truly taking in what you are doing, where you are, who you are with, etc. you recognize the miracle and beauty of life. It's kind of amazing. These are just a few things I've noted from my blossoming mindfulness practice so far.
For more on the psychology of why being present is so hard check out this article. That's all for now!
I set a goal to read more this year. When I was a little girl I would prefer to spend time in front of the window on the living room carpet reading for hours. I only knew hours had passed because I would have to adjust myself back into the patch of sun leaking in through the window and moving along the carpet (talk about a low maintenance kid, you're welcome mom!).
Anyway, as adult matters have taken over so much of my everyday I don't read as nearly as much. Where I used to read several books a week, I now read only a handful a year. That's why I set this goal. I have challenged myself to read a book a month (which I am already lagging behind on).
Since I am not on the beach every month this isn't they won't really be "beach read" but hey, maybe next month!? I decided to start sharing them here to hold myself to my goal so please share and book suggestions in the comments!
On to my first book! In January I started The Icarus Deception: How High Will You Fly by Seth Godin. I must fess up and say I actually listened to this book instead of actually read it. Last year (again trying to get more books under my belt) I subscribed to Audible. I liked it but didn’t love it and missed hearing the words of an author in my own mind’s voice, so The Icarus Deception was the last book on my audiobook list. This may have been part of why I only liked this book a little and didn’t love it.
Godin start’s off strong discussing the Greek myth of Icarus, a man whose father made him wings constructed of feathers and wax. Icarus was told not to fly too close to the sun otherwise his wings would melt, which they did and he then fell into the ocean and drowned. Bummer. But there was another part of the story that Godin claims society has nearly erased from the tale. Icarus's father told him not to fly too low either as the water would also damage his wings. Godin opposes the lesson that society has distorted the story as a fable against aiming too high. He says this mentality supports aiming just high enough to be safe but achieve nothing spectacular, an antiquated mentality resulting from industrialization... Be one of the masses, follow the rules, and produce. That is the way of industrialized society.
I love the discussion of the industrial eras influence on societal psychology. I liked hearing his rationale for why we are ready to move past this model of work. I even enjoyed Godin’s assertion that work should be treated as art, an ongoing creative pursuit of not perfection but expression and connection with others. But after this very strong and compelling start Godin’s encouragement and ideas became very “bumper sticker like” as one person on goodreads put it. He spent the rest of the book discussing what it means to be an "artist." You must ignore criticism if it stops you from working. You must put yourself out there for an audience. You must allow yourself to be vulnerable. You must be willing to just keep doing work to become better. All of this is true, but it isn’t particularly innovative or new news in my opinion.
All in all I think this book is a good beach read and especially best for creatives or quasi-creatives who are hesitant to start something or in a bit of a rut and just need a reminder of their contribution to the world at large. I am personally eager to take this perspective of post-industrialization connection into my own projects. Next for February I have been reading Big Leap, another self improvement book more based in psychological principles. Fun fun fun!
Trump has been in office for a week and the country is on fire. It started with limiting a woman's right to choose and an effort to start dismantling universal healthcare (see the reinstatement of the global gag rule), setting back climate change efforts and clamping down on science as a whole (see Keystone XL & Dakota Access pipelines and Federal science actions), and attacking immigrants on multiple fronts with a particular emphasis on Muslims (see the border wall and Muslim ban). I have been slow to accept our new reality. I tried to be cautiously optimistic the days before his inauguration, then I tried to avoid the news as my greatest fears were being realized, then I was just sad. Now I am really pissed off and ready to work. Trump and his hateful policies must go. So here is what I am doing and I encourage you to do to. And this isn't where I am stopping, if you have any suggestions of other actions we can take please leave them in the comments below so everyone who sees this post can take part too.
Call your representatives, write letters, sign petitions, demonstrate in the streets if you have to! Our representatives are supposed to represent us and so it is our responsibility to make our positions known and continuously apply pressure on them. Use Common Cause's representative locator to find out who your reps are. And if you need a little extra help on what to say, check out this article for some tips about how to talk to your representative when you do call.
When President Obama told us in his farewell speech to organize I had no idea where to start. Luckily I have some incredible friends who did. We have begun by sharing good information and finding ways to do the above (reach out to our representatives). One friend has offered up her apartment on a weekly basis as a hub to create call scripts, make calls, write letters and keep information sharing. There is also an incredible guide and directory of how and where to get involved called the Indivisible Guide. Start with this and you'll be good.
This requires staying informed and not propagating "alternative facts." Misinformation/fake news is a dangerous thing as we have already seen with this administration. We need to armor ourselves with the truth and be cynical with the media we consume. Also, good information is power. Articles like what to do if ICE agents come to your door should be widely shared so that everyone has the knowledge they need.
A little can go a very long way if we all chip in. I am personally giving to the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU), Planned Parenthood and Justice Democrats(at minimum). I will be cutting out my work lunches, extra coffees, and any other frivolous spending to give all that I can. This is an investment in a country I want to live in and society we can be proud of after all!
If we stop believing in the power of the people and democracy there is not way we can win. So please take care of yourself and those directly in front of you first. Practice self care and go at your own pace. Do what you need to in order to feel like you (and not a hopeless shell of you), feel strong, and remain hopeful. We could be in for the long haul and everyone of us needs to be able to take some time for ourselves.
That is all I have, again please add ideas to this list. I want to know what actions you are taking and how you are taking care of yourself. Now is the time more than ever to spread love, count our blessings and support one another to ensure this time does not become our new normal!
XO
So in 2016 I got really into what the interwebs are calling intentional living. Essentially intentional living is living based on your values by making conscious decisions that design a lifestyle around what you believe. Originally, living the kind of life I truly believed in seemed unattainable for me. For me my ideal life would entail consuming less and working toward being zero-waste, eating healthier and higher quailty food, buying from exclusively from sustainable/ethical/local businesses, living slower and being more present in every moment of everyday, committing to and developing my hobbies, and the list goes on and on... For years I was under the impression I couldn't attain all that I just listed either because of finances, time, or a combination of both. Because let's be honest being "green" or buying organic is expensive, and as a twenty-something who largest expense is paying off an education she completed years ago, there isn't a lot of space in the budget for this dream lifestyle. To quote Donald Trump (the only time I ever will btw): WRONG.
There is a way to start easing toward your dream life and living more intentionally. You don't have to buy what society is selling you. Yes, it takes a lot of time self-educating to find alternatives to what is out in the mainstream. And again, yikes!, the money. But if you are like me and are looking for a different way of living, maybe a simpler, slower more conscious one? Then here are 5 ways I have begun building that intentional lifestyle I am truly proud of.
In 2016 I started calling myself a minimalist out loud for the world to hear. Minimalism was the beginning of a major perspective shift for me a few years ago, but I always kept it quiet for fear of being judged as not "minimal enough". But this year I learned being a minimalist isn't about the absence of things or being able to keep a tally of every item. It is about having only what brings me value and joy and being content with just that. It means trading in things that weigh me down, for experiences that brighten my life and encourage me to grow. Minimalism is about gratitude for what I have earned, not yearning for what I must indebt myself to own.
A lot of people say this but I truly believe it, minimalism looks different for everyone because it is about your values and your choices. No one can ever tell me I am doing it wrong because, although I still have a lot of things compared to some people, I am happy and my "stuff" works for my life. 2016 was the year that I became finally became completely content with being my kind of minimalist. One with more plants that can be counted on two hands and a disorganized collection of craft supplies. And once I accepted that my way of living with less should look different from anyone else's I become more comfortable in my home and with my finances. In the past I have had times where I got the urge to impulse buy and then feel guilty later, but now even my "impulse" purchases are in line with my lifestyle leaving me regret free (if that makes sense?). Honestly I could write a whole post (or many) about my minimalist journey, but I have to say last year was a turning point that has solidified this way of life for me!
2016 was also a year where I began to recognize the importance of mindfulness and self care. I have always been the type of person who prides herself on productivity over almost all things. And fortunately up until this year I could work myself non-stop without any repercussions. But this year the stress of working too much began to manifest in physical ailments (nothing too serious) but enough to force me to slow down. I have been Buddhist for 12 years, but I took up meditation to learn about mindfulness in a different way. I wanted to learn how to listen to my mind and body (and hopefully see the warning signs of burnout before it happens!). This mindful meditation has opened my eyes to so many other things that are important to me, like being present with the people I surround myself with and taking out time in the day for myself. And an added bonus, once I became more mindful of each days moments I took little steps to make the day more enjoyable like walking the longer but more peaceful route to work (talk about intentional changes!)!
A big change for me, and one I thought most unattainable, was how I spend my money. I have always wanted to be able to buy sustainable, support great brands that are doing things right but I have always though that would be out of my reach because of my budget. But with the help of minimalism and needing less I found my budget started to loosen up and I could focus on buying a good quality coat made in the US versus having several from my former favorite fast fashion chains. Same goes for household and beauty products. I began carving out time to research natural alternatives in my beauty routine and around the house. And now when shopping for groceries we cut back on meats and focus on great quality produce. To stay on budget I prepare a lot more from scratch (which again takes time), but somehow I have found the time as this became a greater priority for me. By focusing on the power of my dollar and buying things I truly love, from clothes to food, I have gained an even greater respect for what money can do. Everyday better products are becoming more accessible and that is the inertia I want to support.
Hygge (aka hooga). I totally hitched my cart to this bandwagon and have fully committed to the lifestyle. If you have yet to hear, hygge is the Danish philosophy of coziness. Discovering hygge and prioritizing comfort has validated my inner introvert in the most beautiful ways. Last year I made it a point to embrace my moments at home to make them restorative and peaceful. And when hosting I was constantly on the look out for what would make for the most hyygelig experience!
The last way that I found I lived more intentionally in 2016 was by not taking my city for granted! As a New Yorker I tend to overlook the fact that I have access to so many amazing things: culture, public spaces, food, other people! But I took notice last year and took conscious efforts to see new places and get out of my usual routine. In part I was motivated to scratch my chronic travel itch, which I realized from my meditations I shouldn't push aside. It's like they say, YOLO - you only live once so you really have to prioritize the living part! My heart has grown even wider for my city and I have so many new favorite places because of it! So to sum up this post of how I live more intentionally, I will leave you with three of my favorite places I intentionally visited in NYC during 2016!
I look forward to what 2017 brings. Tell me, what do you think of living intentionally? Are you into this concept or do you practice it in your life? I would really like to know!
I am a goal setter. That's why I love the process of looking back on the year and setting new years resolutions. Resolutions are firm determinations that I view as essential to living an intentional life. 2016 was the first year I made goals specifically geared toward travel and I found it really useful when preparing for my trips so I decided to do it again this year!
So here goes, 3 resolutions I am making to myself in my quest for even more enjoyable travel in the years ahead...
I set big themes in addition to my specific resolutions to hone in on characteristics I want to develop in myself. Last year's theme was hustle, a few years before that it was compassion... this year it is self care. I want to make a habit of practicing self care everyday, including when I travel. Whether it is 10 minutes of meditation, or spending more time on my cleansing my face, I want to take better care of me (I talked a bit about this in my birthday post too). This theme may be a direct consequence of my year of hustle which allowed me to see a need for it in every aspect of my life. Practicing self care when traveling is something else I have noticed I skimp on. Sometimes I trade off packing light for bringing leaving behind some of my favorite products in exchange for multi-use ones. Or I rush through meals or sleep less to fit in more activities. Or even book inconvenient flights to squeeze in the most daylight hours at my destination. I want to make sure I don't sacrifice to much comfort when I travel so that when I return home I am not craving a post-vacation vacation!
This year I did a lot of local exploration (which is another new habit I've adopted!) and I plan on expanding this in the new year to short trips around the US! Last year I made the resolution to see more of this vast country, which I did. But I realized late in the game that I could see even more by taking advantage of long weekends and holidays. These types of 2-3 day visits to nearby cities may be just the thing to stave off the lull leading up to a vacation and the post-vacation blues!
My final travel resolution has to do with connecting with people. I am an introvert, and while not rude I generally don't go out of my way to meet new people when I travel. But that is something I want to change. On a recent trip to California I had the opportunity to meet up with a couple of instagram friends, @brownkids (Roe and Erin), and it was truly a life expanding experience (and there aren't many times you get to say that about brunch!). This showed me that although museums and architecture are fine ways to spend your time there is nothing like a conversation amongst people with a variety of perspectives on life.
That pretty much wraps up my travel resolutions (so far)! I would love to know if you have any resolutions for 2017, or if you believe in resolutions at all. And either way, how do you try to travel deeper and improve your experiences overall? Please let me know!
I hope you have a safe and fabulous time ringing in the New Year. Heres to an incredible 2017!!!
Each year after the busyness of the holidays and just before diving into the new year I like to reflect on the year we are leaving behind. This year my reflections brought me back to the travel resolution I made last year. Looking back I am grading myself (in a way) on how well I stuck to my resolutions and if my sentiments changed about any of them.
I give myself an A. This year I made a very conscious effort to take more day trips and explore more of my city which led to discovering so many new gems in my own backyard. But in addition to that I was able to play tourist in both North Carolina and California for short weekend trips. I think this resolution is going to have to stick around and become a permanent habit!
A+ for sure. I have finally gotten my luggage down to a carryon alone for trips up to 2 weeks long! This even includes being able to pop my personal item in there if need be. I have also cut out the frenzied pre-vacation shopping and really utilized what I already own. I think in the new year I will start sharing more of my packing light techniques because it has revolutionized the way I travel!
A+ This was much easier than expected once I really committed to my budget. I think the next step in this for me will be to start a system for tracking my travel spending that allows me to compare trips over several years and better prepare for upcoming ones.
W (for withdraw). So this year I skipped the whole postcard thing altogether. While visiting Tulum this summer sending postcards just wasn't a priority (nor was it at my domestic locales). Maybe postcard sending will become a thing of the past for me, but for now, experiences I will probably try again with this resolution this year!
I give this one an A+. I document my travel experiences and thoughts here on the blog and have been pretty diligent doing so this year (yay!).
A big fat F. Unfortunately, this year the timing just didn't align to take a family trip (meaning my nuclear family... brothers, sisters, parents), but I have definitely redetermined to make this happen next year!!!
After reviewing my goals for this year I am more focused on what I want to achieve for next. I have a feeling 2017 will be less action oriented and more internally driven. Look out for some 2017 resolutions in the coming days!
New Year, Better Me!
Happy Thanksgiving! In the true spirit of the day, and momentarily overlooking the mass murder of America's indigenous peoples, I am thinking about all of the blessings in my life... this post is going to my long a rambly personal reflection so scroll to the bottom for the TLDR (too long didn't read).
This week I got fully knocked out by a stomach bug and was a bit unsure if I could enjoy the feast of the day, but I am still so grateful for my health. And even when sick be able to bounce back quickly. Without general physical and mental good health, the reality of life would be completely different from what I currently enjoy. It is one less thing I do not consciously have to consider and accommodate on a daily basis and for that, I am truly grateful.
This year my Thanksgiving dinner will be with very close friends for whom I am so grateful to have in my life. They were bonus gifts I received when I met my partner. And they are people I am just as happy to spend this day of giving and gratitude with as my own family. All of these people, my family, my wonderful partner and my friends I am so grateful for. I know the power of community and I also know how hard it can be find people to let into your life and love, and I am so appreciative for all of these people that make it so easy for me to love them. And while I am on the topic of family, I am so grateful to have witnessed another year of growth for my family. I feel closer to them than ever and my heart aches in a beautiful way when I think of the eternal bonds we strengthen and share.
I appreciate my spirituality and seeking spirit. I have my grandmother to thank for the former and my parents to thank for the latter. It is my eternal faith in humanity and myself that gives my life mission and allows me to find happiness in the everyday. And the curiosity that my parents fostered that drives so much of my work and hobbies today.
And on a lighter note, I am so grateful for the place I am in my life right now. I tend to be forward-looking and always striving toward the next goal. But this year I have been actively trying to appreciate where I am in this moment because this moment I will never get back. And more importantly, I am happy! I want to bask in my happiness. Of course, there is so much more I want to accomplish and so many many unknowns I have yet to fix or figure out, but I am so grateful for where I am in my journey right now. I am grateful I get to spend my days with someone I love, I am grateful to live in New York City, I am grateful for a job where I get to earn while helping others, I am grateful for the means to support myself and indulge my curiosities, and I am grateful that my family is healthy and making their dreams come true! I am appreciative of all the fortune I have. My life is complicated and challenging but I am glad it is my own.
And finally, in the spirit of this blog, I am super grateful for my passport (and have been thinking about it a lot lately). It is such a freedom to be a citizen of a country like the USA that has a standing in the world that allows me to travel freely to most countries and give me the protections so many people in this world are without. I feel truly lucky and indebted for my place in this world.
Finally, I am grateful to you (yes, you!). Thank you for being here with me. Thank you for clicking and reading. See Soo Much is my passion project, and it would exist whether you were here or not but it is so sooo much more meaningful to me that you are. I have just begun to see that true friends can exist online and it really enriches my life and I have the potential to enrich others as well. So thank you, because if we are not friends yet I truly hope we can become so soon.
Today is my 1 year blog anniversary! I originally began to write a celebratory post about the things I have learned over the past year but that will have to be saved for another day because today I need to discuss something permeating every aspect of my life, including what I write about here.
Yesterday was the 2016 US presidential election and today we got the results.. It has been a precarious couple of years politically but I remained hopeful that we as a country would unite again and make history electing our first female president, as we did in 2008 electing our first black president. But as the whole world knows, that is not what happened. Instead, half of the country decided to go for the isolationist, far more controversial and less qualified candidate. I truly feared this because Donald Trump has repeatedly proven that he is a misogynist, xenophobic, close-minded person with (to put it very generously) a history racist tendencies. As I write this I am holding back a lot of strong words about him right now out of my respect for the office of the President and hope that he will change for the better.
To speak openly, I feel personally hurt right now. Hurt as a woman, as a racial minority, as a religious minority, as someone from an economically disenfranchised class, as a supporter of the LGBT equal rights movement, as a citizen of the country who claims it stands for the equality of all. Hurt that the most qualified woman and devoted civil servant to this country did not win this election. And hurt that our country is so divided and entrenched in a white supremacist and anti-feminist culture that we chose Trump specifically. I woke up this morning unprepared to face the fact that hate won. But despite all of that I am forcing myself to redetermine. Hate won't win. I redetermine to spread love and tolerance. Redetermine to focus on similarities and not differences. Redetermine to come together for the greater good of all society. And redetermine to never give up in the face of defeat.
A friend wrote a very poignant article on how this election impacts the way you travel prior to the election and now on the other side of this election I reflect on some of our vulnerabilities. I am asking myself how we can create a culture in this country to protect against these threats in the future. US citizens, as holders of arguably the most powerful passports and greatest political and economic influencers in the world, I feel have a responsibility to understand (if not see) more of the world. Yes domestic issues are important, but I think a short-sightedness on only our own personal challenges is what allowed so many to become so cynical. So I want to end this post with something a little less complain-y and a bit more motivating...
I write this post not to offend or divide. It is one opinion of millions and I truly believe each person’s opinion and experience is valid. My hope is to just work together toward a loving society that works for all and not just a few.
I would love to hear how others are feeling about this election, in the US and abroad. I want this to be a safe space where we can share, so please keep that in mind if you choose to comment.
Plastic magnets and metal key chains are a nice momento, but I prefer great stories, lessons learned and fond memories any day.
Before I moved back to NYC for graduate school I planned a month long trip of seeing new cities and sleeping friends couches. The plan was to pack up my apartment, move all of my belongings into my much smaller place in the city and then live out of a suitcase until the first day of orientation when I would make it back New York. This was all fine in theory, but as I executed the plan I realized how much stuff I owned and the emotional weight of it all. I was responsible for so many things that it seemed to tie me down and complicate my life. I managed to move and enjoy my vacation, but that month of living out of one bag (despite even that being way over packed!) was a huge revelation to me... I don't need stuff to live the life that I want! And actually, stuff is hampering me from living the life that I want.
It was in 2013 that I got into minimalism. I stopped accumulating things and began appreciating what I had more. I believe minimalism is on a spectrum and is different for each person. For me it was about living lighter and viewing money differently. I now see money as tool for freedom (freedom to travel amongst other things) and not just for more things. I began measuring the cost of things as a fraction of a plane ticket or how many gelatos in Italy that would be (one pair shoes began looking much more delicious when converted to gelato!). This was exciting because it's what matters to me, being a traveler and having the mental and physical space in my life to explore.
Now how does all of that relate to souvenirs!? Well I am so glad you asked! It goes back to minimalism and acting in line with my values. Prior to this mindset I would feel obligated to buy everyone I loved, worked with or even mentioned my trips to a token from where I went. Not only was this expensive but it was totally unnecessary. Typically I would bring home tons of tote bags, notebooks and other random objects that my gift recipients didn't need and although they appreciated it, probably didn't really want. Often times the souvenirs I would buy would be low quality knick knacks and I realized I was just cluttering their lives with things, exactly what I had decided to stop doing in my own life! When I thought about what I would prefer over "some thing" it was a time and conversation about life and lessons and the new cultures explored. And once I decided I would no longer feel obliged to get gifts for everyone I began to get time back on my travels and found myself getting a gift only when it truly reminded me of someone and I knew they would cherish it.
So I suppose all of that to say it’s not that I don’t get souvenirs at all… I just don’t make it a mandatory part of my trips anymore. No more last minute shopping on the way to the airport. And even for myself I rarely bring items home unless it is a particularly beautiful rock from a pebbled beach, a beautifully designed postcard, or a delicious bar of chocolate I couldn't find back home!
If you are like me and feel that the ritual of souvenirs can be overrated but like to bring home tokens to share with family I have found bringing home edibles to share, sending a postcard from your destination or taking perfectly posed photos with fun stories to tell on your return is a more than adequate substitute!
I'd love to know what you think! Do you enjoy buying and/or receiving souvenirs? Do you think I am totally missing the point of them? Or do you agree and think souvenirs is something you'd prefer to skip? I would truly love to know!
Mindfulness has become something of a hot topic. It is a key component of meditation and a lot of Buddhist practices aimed at changing the way you perceive the world. Essentially it is an awareness you develop of your feelings and environment that allows you to be present in the moment and accept the thoughts you may have about what you are experiencing whether positive or negative. In this Harvard Business Review article a leading researcher describes it as being more "sensitive to context and perspective" allowing a person to be more engaged with life. Most notably, the practice of mindfulness in daily life has been shown to result in happier, less stressed-out individuals, something I think it is safe to say everyone would like to be!
Over the past five years I have been applying the principles of mindfulness to different aspects of my life, but it wasn't until recently that I began thinking of how it applies to the way I travel. On reflection I realize I have become more thoughtful of when I travel and my vacations have become more meaningful and memorable for me. I have learned more about the cultures I am exposed to, I have more personal interactions with the people I meet, and I learn more about myself and my values.
I like to think about mindful travel applies in two ways; the external - being mindful of the places you visit and your impact when you travel, and the internal - being mindful of your own experience and emotions.
Cultural consciousness is one aspect of "mindfulness of place." I think of it as simply being conscious of the customs and current events of the places I travel to. As a guest in another country (or even city!) I feel it is my responsibility to be respectful of the culture and aware of the political situations (#staywoke!). And not only is it courteous to the place and people hosting me but it benefits me if I a do a bit of research on my destination. I am able to be more alert of any risks and I'll have point of reference from which I can connect with locals.
In 2015 my partner and I visited Greece at the height of their debt crisis bailout referendum. After boning up on the economic and political issues we prepared ourselves for a variety of scenarios (like having enough cash on hand in case there was a currency shortage!) and knew to be considerate and open minded when speaking with locals about the situation. This helped us be more present and able to connect with and be compassionate with the Greeks we met and we were able to have open conversations with them about their opinions about it giving me a much deeper knowledge on EU politics!
Consciousness of place may also guide the types of activities you partake in. For instance shopping at small businesses and eating at local restaurants that benefit community instead of big commercial chains is a great way to immerse yourself in the true culture of a place and avoid tourist traps (and are usually cheaper and better quality too!) One thing I love to do is stay at airbnbs and get local recommendations from my hosts, they are always so knowledgeable and happy to help you have the most authentic experience. When being mindful of place you may even decide to partake in eco-tourism activities that pay attention to how they impact the environment thereby reducing your ecological impact (a topic I want to discuss more in a post of its own).
The other side of mindfully traveling and creating more meaningful experiences is focusing on how you emotionally experience and process your trip. I personally have a tendency to pack my schedule and see soo much () while I can! But this can leave very little time for me to reflect on everything I experience each day. I like to plan what I call "slow activities" that are less stimulating than traditional sightseeing. This could be a long lunch people watching, a museum where I can linger, or a beautiful sunset. I also like to carry a notebook with me to jot down thoughts or interesting things I notice while exploring and I find sitting down to write a postcard home allows me to reflect more deeply and rewind through all of the new memories fresh in my mind. But truly the best way to take in every experience is to be present, put down the tech and keep my eyes open. Afterall, the point of mindfulness is to be present and experience your life (including your travels!)
The terms introvert and extrovert have been coming up in conversation here and there recently and it has had me thinking... I am an introvert but I love exploring new places. For a while it didn't make sense to me that the only two things I want to be doing at any moment are in complete contrast to each other: being at home and being in a new and foreign place.
As a typical introvert, I have no problem socializing with people but I enjoy smaller groups far more than large ones and prefer one-on-one interaction even more. I generally have 1-2 outside the routine social interactions a week because when I have more I am left feeling pretty drained and off balance. On top of being an introvert I am a homebody, two characteristics that are often mistaken as being mutually exclusive. I love being home and if I can invite people over instead of being in a loud bar the invitation is already in the (e)mail! All that said I still love to travel (hence the blog devoted to it!).
After a little thought I see there are a few reasons introverts are actually the best travelers. Introverted people are often in their own head a lot. When traveling we naturally take time to absorb and reflect on our surroundings and experiences. I am a firm believer that travel is enhanced when you take time between the exploration and adventure to relax and take time with yourself to acknowledge what you have learned. I also think this allows me to appreciate the experience all the more.
On the flip side, traveling is a great way to get an introvert out of their out of their head and their shell. I find myself living more in the moment when I am in a new place. While at home I am a creature of routine, abroad I am forced to be spontaneous and flexible, adventurous and risky. I will adapt my plans on the fly and find ways to communicate in unfamiliar languages to total strangers. I try new foods and new things. And I ask myself "will I regret not doing this" when face with a new challenge.
I suppose travel and exploration is joyful for me (and other like-minded introverts) because of the balance it brings. The challenges and reflective periods both serve as opportunities for growth and reflection. And after all, if nothing else introverts are explorers of the self.
I have a fear of heights and this acrophobia comes up pretty often while I am travelling and this trip was no exception. While in Mexico my partner and I visited some of the beautiful Mayan ruins and Yucatan cenotes which challenged my fear and proved to me once again that I am more courageous and capable than I realize.
I had my first minor scare when visiting the ruins in Tulum. This beautiful place is the only coastal ruins site in the Yucatan and sit atop cliffs overlooking the sparkling Caribbean Ocean. Hiking the ruins were not a big deal until we came to climbing down the steep wooden steps to reach the beach below. I held the rail and scaled the steps slowly, fortunately escaping the scalding sun outweighed my slight hesitation and before I knew it I was in the water.
A couple of days after our visit to the ruins we boarded a bus to Coba, a small town south of Tulum with ruins we heard we could climb. The Coba ruins were very different from Tulum's; they were shaded by forest canopy with structures intact enough to easily identify (like recreational ball courts!). It was here that we climbed the Ixmoja pyramid. I didn't expect these ruins to be as high or steep as they were but I really wanted to see the view from the top. The climb up and down were far more difficult than the steps in Tulum (that I had since forgotten), and as soon as I made it to the top I found a safe place to tuck myself away. But I have to say, standing above the all the trees was an incredible sight.
Looking back now I see each adventure in Tulum was a ramp up our to our afternoon at the Coba cenotes. My honey and I decided hire a cab driver to take us to two: Choo-Ha and Tamcach-Ha. Choo-Ha is a relatively shallow underground swimming pool-like cenote while Tamcach-Ha is 30 feet below grade with an additional 40 foot water depth.
After a quiet swim in Choo-Ha we headed over to the far more "exciting" Tamcach-Ha. I began down the long, wooden spiral staircase but halfway down I panicked. The drop seemed far too high and a very shaky and frantic version of myself rushed back topside with my partner not far behind. After many minutes, the two of us in our bathing suits negotiated my way back down the stairs in an embarrassingly slow fashion.
A tour group was already diving from the 10 and 20 foot high diving boards. While I composed myself on the large platform at the water's surface my boyfriend went for a swim. I watched the old, the young and everyone in between jump from the 10 foot board, I even watched many (including my brave man) jump from the 20 footer. After nearly a half hour of just watching I began feeling some serious FOMO. Maybe it was the scared 10-year old that took the plunge or watching my boyfriend go up and down several times, but I realized that I wanted to be the type of person who could make that jump. I didn't want to go homing knowing I didn't do something I had the chance to try. And I didn't want to be ruled by an irrational fear. I wanted to make that jump, or at least try to. So I climbed up those scary stairs, stood 10 feet above the water (it seemed higher by the way!) and after a few minutes looking down at the water, deliberating my sanity, I jumped!
And it was terrifying, and a little painful, but I did it and it was INCREDIBLE.
This little experience was big for me. I learned more about the woman and partner I want to be. I want to make memories a push myself outside of my comfort zone. It's that little step that did just that for me.
2015 was a challenging and beautiful year filled with huge life transitions and tons of personal growth for me. As I reflect and set my goals for next year I have decided to make concrete travel determinations in hopes of deepening those experiences even more.
This year I want to focus more on exploring my own back yard and my country. Although I have seen much of the East coast, I have only been to the West coast once and haven't seen any of the mid or southwest! Now that my sister is out west I am very motivated to see more. 2016 California road trip? I hope so!
I have gotten really good at packing light, but think I can do even better. I want get my usually crammed carry one to one at least 30% empty to make my trips even easier. I also have a goal of not purchasing any new clothes for my next trip. I usually keep a strict travel budget but always seen to "need" a new dress, bikini or travel pillow. This year I will make do with the plenty that I have!
I want to start a annual savings specifically dedicated for travel. I am hoping I can dedicate some of the bucks I shell out in take out and miscellaneous purchases to this fund to help me always prioritize travel in my life. I mean if this is a bank account set aside for it, it must be serious right?
I have a super bad habit of getting postcards for my loved ones, and even stamps but forgetting to mail them while I am traveling! It's pretty silly actually, I just get so swept up in my trip that I forget. But from now on I want to make the time to drop my family a line and surprise them with a beautiful card.
I have never been much of a journaler, but I want to start jotting down my experiences. Often I will come home and many stories or feelings will feel far away after just a couple weeks but these little moments are worth hanging onto. These are the moments shaping my life and pushing me to appreciate the everyday and that might be something I would like to go back and read someday.
Two years ago my sister and I went to Costa Rica, and although I have had many amazing trips this was probably the most transformative for a relationship. She and I saw each other with new eyes, learned to trust one another in a strange place and gained more respect for one another. This year I want to be sure to travel with my immediate family and grow our relationships while having a blast.
I used to think I could never budget in travel (especially out of the country) into my life. But I have come to realize even the tightest budget usually has some wiggle room. This of course doesn't apply to everyone's circumstance, but I assume if you are reading this you are like me and have an income and financial responsibilities that seem to leave you with little space for much else, but chances are you do. Here is how I found that extra space and why you can probably afford to travel after all.
My favorite trick when saving up for a trip is the "those boots are 3 nice dinners in Rome" trick. Imagining myself in Rome eating fresh pasta wins out over another pair of black ankle boots every time. Once I got serious about my travel goals my impulse to buy a new coat every season or own four slightly different black blazers felt frivolous. And it expanded past my closet, my late night Amazon orders became more methodical and I felt more in control of my wallet. I didn't feel like I was sacrificing either (my biggest fear in budgeting) I felt like I was investing in something much bigger. And in the end could see that cutting back on shopping made space in my life for experiences and true value.
There is probably cash in your closet, or garage or under you bed. When I am saving for a trip I take the opportunity to purge the excess in my life. As I am spending less on the miscellaneous I am also auditing anything "extra" that I don't use or need anymore. I try to sell these "extras" online (usually clothing), and what I don't sell I donate because after all I just recognized that I don't need it. I would never recommend booking a trip and then selling all of your material belongings, not for a casual vacation anyway, but I have always been refreshed to come home after an amazing trip to a decluttered home. It has served me as a blank slate on which to implement all of my new post-vacation inspiration.
I have found the only truly maleable part of my budget is what I spend on food. In part, because of where I live (New York City) and my lifestyle (fairly busy and on the go) my food budget has tended to go uncalculated and as a result be very inflated. Once I started tracking my food purchases I realized that I eat out a lot more than I thought, I eat way more candy and desserts than I knew, and my groceries often go unused and wasted (totally unacceptable). It took a lot of planning, but I have been able to slash my take-out/order-in habit by more than half and barely throw away anything in my fridge anymore. Do the math yourself, that $5 coffee everyday if cut down to just a few days a week is almost a $1000 plane ticket each year. Or your $12 work-day lunch is $240 for the month, pack a lunch every other day and you have a night in a nice hotel or a few days in an airbnb. Makes a home brew and bagged lunch seem more appealing right?
You may not believe me, but it really is not. All things are relative. I used to think in order to go abroad I would need loads of cash, I mean just having hundreds (if not thousands) of dollars upfront for a ticket is pretty intimidating. But getting there is often the most expensive part of travel, I assure you. Of course it all depends on the type of trip you are looking for. I tend to travel like a local for shorter periods of time. I don't like to leave the country if I don't have at least a week to spare, but never travel for more than a month (by week three I am usually missing my routine at home). By "traveling like a local" I mean that I eat out but not at expensive touristy places every night. I visit attractions but avoid touristy package deals and opt for curating my own experience. And I don't shop for souvenirs or the like while away. When keeping to these rules I tend to stay at or under my daily budget at home so that lodging and my flight are my only additional expenses.
I have a hard time riding in glass elevators at the mall, and when I was 6 years old I broke into hysterics in the crown of the Statue of Liberty at the thought of looking out. I have a serious fear of heights, but last year in the middle of the Costa Rican jungle my sister encouraged me to jump off of a swinging bridge like Tarzan and bungee hundreds of feet to safety. The entire day zip-lining was a huge accomplishment for me but the Tarzan Swing was going too far. But something about being abroad took me out of myself and when Olivia asked me if I would regret not trying it I thought I just might and so I went for it and still feel proud to this day that I did it.I'm not saying you need to jump off of bridges in foreign lands (I mean I would probably never do it again as I screamed and held my eyes tight for the whole 10 seconds in the air!) but I do believe leaving your comfort zone allows you to learn things about yourself that you might not at home. I learned that day I am more courageous than I thought, and that I trust my sister wayyy more than I thought, an invaluable lesson learned for me.
I choose experiences over things because no pair of shoes or gadget has exposed more of myself to me. And by no means have I given up all material items, but when it comes down toit I choose the promise of a moment and memory over the new addition to my wealth of things.
Another reason I stand by the motto “seek moments not things” is because I find that “things” have this funny way of holding me back from the moments. If its not the direct financial investment, it manifests indirectly. Whether it is the car payment from the nicer new car, or the burden of credit cards, or even significantly overpacking because I couldn’t choose what to take (true story, it sucked lugging a 50lb suitcase and carry-on across 3 countries for a month), the stuff in my life tended to creep into my consciousness leaving little room for experiences. I lusted after items outside of myself instead of enriching my life with things I could carry with me forever. Yet when I would make it away for my stuff filled apartment I wasn’t thinking about the new Vitamix I wanted nor did I miss the 10 blazers left at home in my closet. When I realized this my perspective had finally shifted and I found stashing away money wasn’t as difficult as before. I saw it as an investment in adventure, because unlike Carrie Bradshaw I don’t want to be the old lady who lived in her shoes, I want to be the woman who travelled the world.
For me, life is about finding your happy balance. I find my balance requires more memories, more learning, and more experiences than things. Value-creating moments with myself and people I care about.
